Children while growing up are often faced with coercion from their fellow group friends to change their attitude, behaviour, morals, etc. to conform to the group's actions, fashion sense, taste in music and television, or outlook on life. This compulsive stress faced by children is commonly referred to as peer pressure.

All young people nowadays go through this phase sometime or the other in their lives. Parents often find it strange to find their children suddenly switching over to a particular dress like fringed jeans or short skirt. Modern acceptance of promiscuity can be another important heated topic of debate between the parents and the children.

Some more examples of changes observed in children, who are bowed down by peer pressure include wearing odd earrings, going for body piercing or tattoos, listening to only western music, watching only sports channels, visiting pubs and bars, increasing consumption of junk foods, watching indecent movies in cinemas or through the Internet, etc.

Whether it leads to pink hair or toungue piercing, peer pressure is a powerful reality and many parents do not even realise its effects. It can also be a negative force in the lives of adolescents, often resulting in their experimentation with tobacco, alcohol, and illegal drugs. These bad habits tamper with their studies as well.

Therefore, issues related to peer pressure need to be tackled immediately.

• Children suddenly switch to a particular dress like fringed jeans or short skirt.
• Children wear odd earrings.
• They go for body piercing.
• They listen to only a particular genre of music such as western music, etc.
• They watch only a specific class of channels in TV such as sports channels.
• Children start visiting pubs and bars.
• There can be an increase in their consumption of junk food.
• They watch indecent movies in cinemas or through the Internet, etc.
• Peer pressure can result in experimentation with tobacco, alcohol, and illegal drugs.

Preparing children to cope up with peer pressure begins very early in life.
Children, who are able to stand up to negative peer pressure, are not only the result of good parenting strategies, but they are also the product of strong families with good communication and clearly visible values. Children pick up values from their families and what they see around them.

Therefore, the inability of parents to give a clear message to the children that is consistent with their own lives is an important cause for them giving in to peer pressure.

Peer pressure is also a result of children’s growing up and alienating themselves from their parents. In their attempt to prove their individualism, children often tend to act like their friends. Often, children, who do not have a good foundation, cave in to peer pressure and find themselves doing things they do not want to.

Parenting is one long conversation with the children. Making children aware of the consequences of their actions and decisions is an important prerequisite of parenting.
Parents should keep an eye on the peer group that their children belong to. They should know that children may, at times, need help to be able to say no and still remain a part of that group.

Therefore, support your children's social development by teaching them how to form positive relationships. Children who have difficulty making friends also need your support to avoid being isolated or bullied by the kids around.

Teach your children how to refuse offers for cigarettes, alcohol and drugs. Research has proved that children use tobacco, alcohol, and illegal drugs in their attempt to be accepted, to belong, and to be noticed in their group or environment. Therefore, it is important to help your children learn what qualities to look for in a friend, and advise them appropriately on what to say if offered harmful substances.

Making children comfortable with what they can say while refusing to peers goes a long way in training them to handle peer pressure. For instance, shy children and adolescents can say, “No thanks,” or “I have to go,” while those who are more outgoing can be taught to say something like, “Forget it!” or “No way!” Parents need to role-play peer-pressure situations with their children to make them understand the real life scenario.

Talk to young people about how to avoid undesirable situations or people who break the rules. Children who choose friends who do not smoke, drink, use drugs, steal, and lie to their parents are far less likely to do these things themselves.
Ask children to take help from friends during stressful peer pressure situations. When young people anticipate stressful situations, teach them to bring as many friends as possible around them for support.

Let young people know that it is okay to seek an adult’s advice. Be approachable and friendly to them so that they feel comfortable while seeking your advice. Other trusted adults can also help them avoid stressful situations such as offers to smoke, drink, or use drugs.

Nurture a sense of strong self-esteem among children. Strong self-esteem helps children make independent decisions and follow them even if their friends think some choices are not “cool”. For fostering self-esteem, parents can be generous with praise, teach children how to perceive themselves in positive ways, and avoid unnecessary criticism of children that may take the form of ridicule or shame.

In case, you have tried all the above suggestions and still have questions regarding your child who has given way to peer pressure, you can ask for a practical solution from Jiva. Jiva makes use of the know-how of its expert educationists and the ancient wisdom from Ayurveda to provide you consultation for these kinds of problem. Please feel free to contact Jiva at 0129-4088152 or write to us at asksteve@jiva.com. We will try our best to give a solution to your child’s problem with our expertise.